[MMA]: Sapp vs Conan

Despite repeated attempts, Bob Sapp has been unable to export his superstardom from Japan into the United States. His fights do not attract any sizable attention, and his film roles are nothing that would keep Brian Bosworth up at night.

But Lord knows the man tries: his latest coup appears to be a role in Lionsgate’s “Conan the Barbarian” retread, which might be intriguing given recent advances in visual effects -- or an unmitigated disaster given that most remakes stink like three-day old summer garbage. According to LatinoReview.com, Sapp will play Ukafa, a soldier jealous of his commander’s son; Jason Momoa will play the title character. And if we’re really lucky, Mickey Rourke will play Conan’s dad.

Lionsgate has been very good to fighters who enjoy wearing make-up: their straight-to-DVD features are a rich resource for MMA fighters looking to remain conscious during working hours. “Conan” will shoot in Bulgaria soon for a 2011 release.